Blind Date: Tamora Pierce Style!
by Firedragon12
Summary: Since I stink at summarys, all I can say is that I will set my killer fluffy pink rabbit on you if you don't read this story. You have been warned.
1. The Begining of the Show

A/N- IMPORTANT! PLEASE READ!!! In this show they have little thought bubbles where it shows the people's pretend thoughts. Those will be in these: [ ]. There are also captions that show advice at the bottom of the screen. Those captions will be in these: ( ) If you haven't seen the show,1. I suggest you watch it, 2. I think you'll figure out how the show works verrrrrrrrrrrrry fast. Please R/R! Oh, and try to suggest odd couples that will probably never work, but that my twisted and strange mind can somehow either make work, or at least have very funny thought bubbles. I'll be a vaction from the 7th to the 17th or 18th, but review anyway! P.S Read the A/N at the bottom as well please!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Blind date OR Tamora Pierce's work; no matter HOW much I plot and scheme. Oh well. Some people get all the luck. *Sulks*  
  
Blind Date: Tamora Pierce Style  
  
Creepy Announcer guy (Who will be known as CAG from now on)- Hello and welcome to Blind Date!!!  
  
*Jeopardy theme music comes on*  
  
Audience- Duh nuh nuh na na nuh na nuh, ect.  
  
CAG- That's the 5th time this week!! STOP DOING THAT!!!  
  
*Normal theme music comes on*  
  
CAG- Anyway, Here's the Blind date for today. Lord Wyldon and Keladry of Mindaliean (A/N- I know I probably spelled that wrong but whatever.)  
  
*2 pictures appear one of Kel's face, one of Wyldon's*  
  
*Kel's face now covers Wyldon's and the following caption appears*  
  
Keladry  
  
Piercings: Ears and bellybutton.  
  
Age:21  
  
Turn on: Bad boys and humor  
  
Turns off: Baldies  
  
Her turn on: Strong, can use a sword  
  
Her turn off: Sometimes forgets to show how she feels.  
  
*Then it's Wyldon's turn*  
  
Wyldon of Cavall  
  
Piercings: None  
  
Age: Around 50-ish  
  
*Wyldon comes running in and trys to kill the person who does the bios*  
  
Wyldon-I told you not to say how old I was!!!!!  
  
*Stands up on a random chair and beats chest while yelling a war cry, then jups down and begins beating up yet another random person*  
  
Director-*begins dialing local insane asylum's number*  
  
CAG- NOOOOO! Don't do that! We need him for the date!!  
  
Director- Fine..  
  
Turn on: Ladylike women  
  
Turn off: Manly women (A/N-What??? Oh well.)  
  
His turn on: Ummm.  
  
His turn off: BALD, mean, bad temper, sometimes insane.ect.  
  
CAG- We'll be right back after these commercials!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Big scary grin*  
  
A/N- Hoped you liked it! Please, send me ideas for anything, where to go, captions, thought bubbles, who should date next.anything! ^_^ Thanks! 


	2. Wyldon and the Hotel Stairs

A/N- Read author note on first chapter. I know Wyldon's married, but I just couldn't resist using him! Please R/R, and send me ideas for anything to do with the show, especially places to go. Currently, they are in America, but I'd really like to put them in Tortall..  
  
*************Commercials************  
  
Freaky strange guy comes on-screen- Hi there! I'm here to tell you about the new snack sensation. Monkey Guts!!!! It tastes like chicken all the time, anytime!! *Guy smiles a BIG, FAKE smile* Only 59.99 per pound! Buy monkey guts now, and pay no tax! *Guy quickly crosses fingers behind back* Trust me, they are GREAT!!!  
  
***********Commercial 2*************  
  
This show was provided by: School for Giftless and boringly average people- "We supply entertainment for people that just aren't special" and Soy Ice cream- "Our Ice cream is great. REALLY!"  
  
***********End Commercials***********  
  
CAG- Welcome back to....Blind Date!  
  
Audience- YAY!!!  
  
CAG- I'm your host, Creepy Annoying Host Guy!!  
  
Audience- Silence  
  
CAG-WELL?????????????  
  
Audience- *Bursts into applause*  
  
CAG- Thank you. Now, let's focus on the date at hand, shall we? We have transported them to Seattle, Washington. Let's see what they're up to.  
  
*Camera changes scenes to focus on Wyldon driving a car*  
  
Wyldon- This contraption they call a car is strange and unnatural! I never want to drive in one again!!! [I'm driving!! WOOHOO!!!!]  
  
Wyldon-I hate blind dates, I never should have signed up! I will most likely be stuck dating some idiot girl who is a knight!!! Or wants to become one!!!!!!! [I'll bet she's a foxy mama!]  
  
(Blind Date Tip 1# - Don't rave and rant, especially about a girl you are going to date. It generally leaves a bad first impression.) Wyldon- *Pulls up in front of the Marriott Hotel.* I am NOT nervous! I will be a manly man!!! [ I'm gonna wet myself!!!!]  
  
(Blind Date Tip 2#- Don't wet yourself. Girls like personal hygiene.)  
  
Wyldon- Why do these stairs have to be so BEEP BEEP BEEEEEP long!!!!????? It'll take me all day to get to her!  
  
(Blind Date Tip 3#-Use elevators. Bring flowers. For some reason, you did neither.)  
  
Wyldon- ARG!! [This had BETTER be a foxy mama!] I hate climbing stairs!!!  
  
(Blind Date Tip 4#- Deal with it!!!)  
  
Wyldon-*half-hour later* I.. Made.. It! *Wheeze* Finally!! *Wheeze*  
  
(Blind Date Tip 5#- Wheezing old bald mans generally don't have ANY appeal to 20 year old women.)  
  
*Wyldon rings Kel's doorbell*  
  
Kel- Hi! I'm Kel! [I'm dating a wheezing old bald man! This stinks!]  
  
Wyldon- I'm Lord Wyldon. [You can call me Wyldie!] Let's go. *Heads for stairs*  
  
Kel- Shouldn't we take the elevator Wyldon? It's faster.  
  
Wyldon- 1 week of punishment duty!!!! Always call me LORD Wyldon!!! [Or Wyldie whatever works for you, foxy mama]  
  
Kel- Riiiiiiight..... [I'm dating a TRAINING MASTER!!! I'm DOOMED!!]  
  
Wyldon- *Walks to elevater* Well??? Let's go!  
  
Kel- Joy.  
  
*Screen turns to CAG in the studio*  
  
CAG- We'll be right back, but first these annoying people will try to sell you stuff!  
  
A/N- So???? Review, send me ideas for commercials, places to go in Tortall, ect., ect. Thanks! ^_^ 


	3. A Barney follower gets DESTROYED!

A/N-Sorry I haven't updated! I was banned from the site! But, I'm back on now, making wonderful stories (^_^) that everybody should R/R! Please send me ideas for people to date, places to go, commercials, anything. It's more fun for me to write if you do that! Subliminal messaging is so much fun! Oops, I didn't mean to say that out loud.  
  
Disclaimer- I don't own this show! Or the books! Do you think I'd be writing fanfiction if I owned either/both of these???? Well, yeah. I probably would be..  
  
Blind Date: TP style!  
  
**********Commercial 1***********  
  
Freaky old guy- Do your dentures fall out? Do they have so much mold on them that they won't clean properly? If so, toss out your old dentures and buy a.Squeaky clean! These dentures don't grow mold or fall out! They are attached to your teeth with super glue to keep you dentures cozy in your mouth! So buy a Squeaky clean now at the super low price of 159.99!  
  
Fast voice- Super glue not included.  
  
**********Commercial 2**********  
  
CAG-Now for a limited time only, from the makers of Soy ice cream, Soy Jell- O! It comes in three tasty flavors, Strawberry, lime, and grape! Hurry while supplies last!  
  
**********Back to the show**********  
  
CAG- *Says this so loud it blows off the toupees of all the men in the audience* WELCOME BACK TO OUR SHOW! *Freakish grin* I WILL RULE YOU ALL! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Camera Guy- Dude, we're rolling! And stop practicing intros for the doom show! You'll get fired! You should be practicing for Barney! I looooove Barney! I love you, you love me---  
  
Authoress-*Runs onstage* AHHHHHHHHHH!!! THE PAIN!!YOU SHALL SUFFER MY WRATH!!  
  
*Points at Camera man, thunder and lightning flashes*  
  
Camera guy-*runs away screaming* I DON'T LOVE BARNEY ANYMORE!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!  
  
Authoress-*looks satisfied* Goodbye everyone! *Does Princess wave, then walks of stage*  
  
CAG-Oooookay...Let's get back to Kel and Wyldon, shall we?  
  
*Screen switches over to Kel and our friend, Wyldie* *Kel and Wyldon are sitting in Wyldons car on the way to the Space Needle, in Seattle.  
  
Kel- Sooooo...  
  
Wyldon- *Stares blankly* [*singing* I'm going on a trip with a foxy mama, I'm on a trip with a foxy mama la la la la laaaaaa.]  
  
Kel- WYLDON!! STOP THE CAR!  
  
Wyldon- *pulls out of daydream/song and looks around* WHAT!? WHERE'S THE FOXY MAMA!? *turns bright red* I mean, where's the cream filling? Yeah, that's it.  
  
Kel- Urg..  
  
Wyldon- *Walks up to this girl wearing some REALLY skimpy clothes, and he starts making out with her*  
  
(Blind date tip 6# DON"T MAKE OUT WITH OTHER WOMEN ON YOUR BLIND DATE!!!)  
  
Wyldon- *Walks back over to Kel* Well, let's go in...  
  
Kel- Kel?  
  
Wyldon-Oh yeah!!!  
  
(Blind date tip 7#- Don't forget your date's name. Let's see how long this date lasts. I;m guessing.. 5 more minutes. at max.  
  
Kel-Okay, let's go in! *Looks around, then sees Wyldon flirting with the ticket lady* WYLDON!!  
  
Wyldon- What? I don't understand American money, so I just had made out a little with Glenda here.  
  
Kel- AHHHHHH! That's it! I'm leaving! Go have fun with the b**** over there, but I am SO not going to date you!!!  
  
Wyldon- Darn. Oh well! Bye! [Aww, I lost a foxy mama!]  
  
CAG- Well, that went well! *Crickets chirp*  
  
CAG-Yeah.. Anyway, when we get back, bloopers!  
  
A/N- SO?? Send me ideas for stuff! You know you want to! 


	4. Bloopers

A/N- WRITER'S BLOCK! I finally got rid of it! YAY! I am frolicking like a lamb in May! Read and review! I've had so many suggestions! Thank you! Keep 'em coming! I'm going to try to include as many as possible, but it may take awhile.  
  
Disclaimer- I don't own any of it! *Puts hands up* WHAT? I don't... Oh yeah, I own the part I wrote..  
  
Blind Date: TP Style  
  
******Commercial 1******  
  
Balding woman comes on screen- Hi! I am Rid Iculous, and I'm trying to sell you baby kittens, for a ridiculous amount of money! I'll give you one adorable baby kitten for just 999$! Call 1-800-637-911! THANKS!  
  
******Commercial 2******  
  
Disembodied Male Voice- Hi! BUY OOMPA LOOMPAS! Collect them all for the low price of $100,000,000,000,000, and ninety-two cents! Shipping and handling not included.  
  
******Commercial 3****** Tamora Pierce books can't be beat fa la la la la la la la, reading them sure is a treat, fa la la la la la la la laaaaaaaaaaa.  
  
Happy Holidays!!!  
  
******End of Commercials******  
  
CAG- Hi! Welcome back! It's time for.... BLOOPERS!  
  
*Audience Cheers*  
  
CAG- *Turns to BIG (265 inch) T.V* Let's see what we have here. in our after date footage.  
  
*Cameras switch to Kel and Wyldon*  
  
Kel- *Sitting on top of Wyldon, her sword in his broken arm* You bleed too much Wyldon! *Stands up* Drop and give me twenty!  
  
Wyldon- One! OW! Two! OW! Three! OW!  
  
Kel-SUFFER!!  
  
*Later, Wyldon talking to a camera man* Wyldon- You know, you should never date these warrior chicks! They're so touchy!  
  
*Kel comes in and punches him on the face*  
  
Neal- *appears from nowhere* Go Kel! Go Kel! It's your birthday! Uh-huh! *Disappears*  
  
Camera man-*Runs away, screaming* AHHH! THE PHANTOM CHEERLEADER!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!  
  
Neal- *Reappears, and smacks the camera guy, now known as Bob, on the head* I am NOT a cheerleader! I am a..... A KNIGHT!  
  
Bob-*Whimpers*  
  
*Neal disappears again*  
  
*Screen goes back to CAG*  
  
CAG-And after a brief break, we will get started on our next date! Who will we tourture. I mean force to.. I mean..oh, just watch the show!  
  
A/N- I'm sorry it's so short! I got some really great ideas though! I'm going to write thank yous in my next chapter, so write reviews! And don't forget to tell me anything, like who should date next, (After the next chapter) where they should go, ect. For dating, you can even tell me Duke Barid and Aly!!! I might just do it.. 


	5. Lies, deception! Sortof

AN-I got sooooooooooooo many great suggestions! I have 3 new episodes all ready for the writing! Here are the thank yous:  
  
Veralidaine Sarrasi: Thanks for the great pairings! I normally don't do slash, but I'm working on chapters for the other ones...  
  
Eara: Keep running, keep running!!  
  
DragonWings144: Bwhahahahahahahahaha!!! This is going to be fun!  
  
Imperfectionist ;D : Thank you so much for the great, wonderful, fabulous ideas! I am having so much fun with them...  
  
Death Goddess Assassin: ^_^ Thank you! That would be fun to do...  
  
And for chapter 5 reveiwers....  
  
rora the wise: Brillant! *Laughs demonically with her*  
  
Tenken no Miko: No one's ever suggested that before...good idea!  
  
Dunno: BEST COMPLIMENT ON EARTH!!! I could make the stump smile! I could make the stump smile! *dances around*  
  
A/N (Did you miss me?): That was the thank yous for chapter four/five reviews. Review more for this chapter! ^_^  
  
******Commercial One******  
  
Announcer guy- *says all this with a squeaky voice*Hello! Do you have a problem with stuttering? I used to, and then I used... STUTTER AWAY! Now, I have a big, manly, powerful voice. This can happen to you too, if you use Stutter Away!  
  
******Commercial Two******  
  
Announcer person- Do you want a million dollars? TOO BAD!  
  
Thank you for watching this pointless commercial.  
  
******End commercials******  
  
CAG-Hello, and welcome back to.... THE SHOW!!!  
  
*cricket chirps (again)*  
  
CAG- WHERE IS THAT CRICKET!? I"LL KILL IT! STOMP IT! CRUSH IT! AHHHHHHHHH!! *breathes deeply* Calm, Bob, calm.... Today, our blind daters are: Alanna of Trebond and.... Roger of Conte! Profiles, please!  
  
*camera turns to big T.V screen*  
  
Alanna- Piercing/s: Ears  
  
Age: 28  
  
Turn on: Big noses  
  
Turn off: Certain Dukes, anyone who like anchovies  
  
Her turn on: Purple eyes  
  
Her turn off: Has an anger management problem  
  
*Rogers face covers Alanna's face*  
  
*Roger runs onstage*  
  
Roger- I have beaten you Alanna! I have come back from the dead! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
*runs off stage*  
  
CAG- Ooookay....back to the profile...  
  
Peircing/s: Nose  
  
Age:35  
  
Turn on: Dashing smile, charming personality  
  
CAG- Hey, we're paid to lie. *shrugs*  
  
Turn off: Evil nature (obsession with killing nephews)  
  
His turn on: Women who like jalapeños and LAMPSHADES!!!  
  
Roger-*comes running back onstage* HEY! I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL ANYONE ABOUT MY SECRET PASSION FOR LAMPSHADES!!! You know, you guys have serious problems with keeping secrets. I was watching the show on The Evil Dead Network, and you told about Wyldon's age.  
  
Wyldon-*joins Roger* WHAT ABOUT THAT? I'M PERFECTLY YOUNG, I TELL YOU, PERFECTLY YOUNG!!  
  
CAG- *cough* Liar! *cough* Sorry. Did you know it's cold season?  
  
Wyldon and Roger- Really?  
  
*they ponder this for a moment, then Wyldon starts running around, screaming*  
  
Wyldon-AHHH! NOT THE COLD!! NOT THE COLD!!! *runs of the stage*  
  
CAG-Alright, moving along, there's nothing to see here...  
  
His turn off: Any female who has purple eyes, red hair, pretended to be a male for eight years, and is short.  
  
Audience-*About half of the Audience leaves the building* Aww man...  
  
CAG-Wait! Come back! HE'D JUST KILL YOU ANYWAY!!  
  
*they come running back to watch the show*  
  
CAG- That's better. Can we PLEASE finish this?  
  
*Camera turns to the screen again*  
  
CAG-Leeeeeeeet's play ball!  
  
*everybody stares at him*  
  
CAG- Let's just watch the date...*grumbles* 


	6. Romantic adventures after some tampering...

A/N-Please review! Also, when you review, could you think up places to go, as well as pairings…? Thanks! And if you guys don't remember ( ) are thoughts, and [ ] are little commenting guys.

Storm Queen- Amazing how popular they're becoming, isn't it?

Veralidaine- Eh, no problem. Though, I'm now part of the Witness protection program, so you can't find me.

Tris-MEEP! See! I updated! No need to fry me! Excellent pairings, by the way.

Dalamar- Thanks and that was a complete mistake. Sorry!

Hawaiian-girl- Same as Dalamar.

DATE TIME

Alanna-is busy putting on earrings (earbobs) and a little bit of make-up and fixing her dressIf he's a sorcerer, I'll go medieval on him!

[Sarcastic Sam- Might be a little hard in the dress]

Roger-driving towards Alanna's house Stupid CAG, announcing my age…stares into the camera What are you looking at?! I AM SOMEONE TO BE FEARED, NOT AN OLD GEEZER!

[Pessimistic Peter- Uh, you died…twice. More than most normal people do. If you're lucky, you might die a third time tonight!]

Alanna- I'm so nervous! He'll be nice though, they wouldn't set me up with anyone mean. I hope. They'd better be hoping too. Reveals knife hidden in her shoe BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

(Calm down Alanna. Do that yoga thing Thayet told you about) Alanna- In, out…in, out. Feel the inner peace…starts stretching Now, we move into the urinating dog….

Roger-AHHH! Take that! And that! And that! Is currently tossing magical flames at the camera, which is hurricane-proof, water-proof, thunder/lightning-proof, and all other things-proof YOU SHALL DIE FOR SPYNG ON ME! Though, I do look _amazing _in a camera, don't I? poses for it

[Firedragon- Ewwww, please, let's get on with this!]

Alanna-Thayet was right about that stuff, I feel much calmer now. Tghough, I feel a strange need to use the toilet….coughs Anyway….

doorbell rings

Alanna-Finally! It's my dream man!

Roger- can hear mumblings from inside the door Okay, I'm going out go out with a crazy chick who talks to herself. I am so much better than that. smooths extremely gelled hair

[Sarcastic Sam- Yeah, about that hair…next time try cutting down from 13 bottles, to 11. It's the best way to cure an obsessive-compulsive disorder]

Alanna-Answers door Hel-

Roger- Ho-

Alanna and roger- beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep

Alanna- What the BEEP are you BEEPing doing here?

Roger-You are BEEPing not my BEEPing date!

Chaos ensues

Firedragon-walks in Alright, break it up! Almighty author, coming through! Are you listening!? I am writing this fanfiction, and therefore I have the power to turn you, Alanna, into a knight's husband, doomed to be a lady forever, and I could turn you, Roger, into a purple penguin. GO on the date, and I won't be forced to take drastic meausures.

Roger- face pales Darling, let's go…

Alanna-shoots death glare Coming, sweetheart.

Firedragon- Ah, young love. Runs away, really, really fast

Both of them are in the car

Roger- has returned to banging on the car You stupid contraption! I will blast you!

Alanna- sighs Jeeze, blame the inanimate object.

Roger- You would do well to be quiet! I can still best you with magic!

Alanna- is getting really mad Then how did I kill you twice? Huh, punk?

Roger- YOU CHEATED! Stupid car!!!

Alanna- tosses him out of the car window and takes control of the wheel SO LONG SUCKER! Have fun walking!

at the restaurant

Alanna- is sitting down at the table eating B-B-Q shrimp and filet mignon Oh, yummy!

[Pessimistic Peter- Don't get any on your dress. It could burn right through the fabric, then through your leg, and you would be lame for the rest of your life. Oh, the joy I feel.]

Roger- stumbles in Wow….food…….drools

Alanna- Yup. I spent all of our allotted date money though, so you'll have to scrape up some spare change.

Roger- Spare change!? This drink alone costs $60!

Alanna- Polishes off meal Too bad, because their wine is fabulous.

[Sarcastic Sid: Ooh, she's good. Roger, you gaping codfish! Go! Rob a bank! Get her back!]

Roger- looks down at the screen Now that's not a bad idea! Runs off to rob a bank

Alanna- Oh well. The cars mine then!!! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!! Hops in the car and revs up the engine SO LONG, DUCKIES!

CAG: CUT TAPE! cough Ummm…it appears our contestants are..um…not feeling well today. You should go, get amnesia, and therefore, forget you ever watched this show.

Firedragon- WAIT!!! DON'T DO IT! You have to review first. Then you can go and get amnesia. Please send in places to go…pairing will have to wait however, as I have so many ideas, I'll have to make a whole new season. Thanks!


	7. Gummy Bears

A/N- For some reason, the asterisks aren't always working—please excuse me for that. From now on, I will use .Go talk to Fido! It's all his fault. Takes out machine gun POW! POW!  
  
Thanks for the reviews! (Extra special kudos out to megster for the place to go, and the subtle hint of what to do there, and to Tenken no Miko for the great pairing)  
  
Commercial 1  
  
Announcer- When you take a shower, does your hair get wet? It does. Does it bug you? Of course! That's why YZARC inc. invented---shower caps! These are multipurpose! They will keep your hair from getting wet, provide a wonderful place to store dog food, and look good with any kind of clothing!  
  
Go! Find one at a store near you!

Commercial 2  
  
Announcer- Do announcers annoy, irritate, and in all ways frustrate you? Than, murder one tod—ACHHH! dies  
  
We are sorry for the interruption. Please continue to watch your program, and waste your money on pointless things. Thank you.  
  
End Commercials  
  
CAG- Welcome back toooo--- BLIND DATE! Due to the fact that THERE WAS NO SHOW LAST TIME (A/N- you had to go get amnesia, remember? Well, no, you don't.), there will be no bloopers of the show that wasn't filmed. We apologize for this inconvenience. Anywayyyyyy, let's get on with the next blind date! We'll be going back in time with Squire Alan and Delia, with Alan's knight master Jonathan as the chauffeur, and assistant. Bios, please.  
  
camera turns to Bob—I mean, big scream----OH, who cares!  
  
Name: Alan of Trebond  
  
Piercings: None  
  
Age: 16  
  
Turn on: People taller than her cough HIM, non-wimpy people  
  
Turns off: Wimps, girls that flutter their eyelashes too much  
  
His turn on: Purple eyes, strong  
  
Her turn off: Purple eyes, temper (Please note that purple eyes might not be a pro)  
  
Alanna- Hey! My eyes are sexy!!! DON'T DISS THEM!!!!! So, who am I going out with, anyway?  
  
CAG- mutters Delia.  
  
Alanna- What?  
  
CAG- slightly louder Delia  
  
Alanna- WHAT?  
  
CAG- DELIA!!!  
  
Alanna- AHHHHH!!! starts tossing things in the general direction of his head  
  
CAG- hides behind camera guy Mommy!  
  
Camera Guy- Ummm... could I have some pizza?  
  
CAG- WHAT?  
  
Camera Guy- I wanted to know if I could have pizza before you die.  
  
CAG- I'm not going to die, her aim's horrible!  
  
Camera Guy- No, I'm talking about the huge anvil that she just dropped of the top of the set.  
  
blam  
  
Firedragon12- swoops in Why am I here again? This is the second time in 2 episodes!!! Don't make me give you the glare of death. rounds on Alanna Why do you always have to kill evil people? First Roger, than Roger, and then CAG! turns to camera guy Why does everyone hate me???  
  
Camera Guy- Ummm...  
  
Firedragon12- Yes, well. I suppose I'll have to bring him back to live. Yoohoo! CAG! I have Care Bear gummies for you!  
  
Alanna- What?  
  
Camera guy- How is that going to work?  
  
Firedragon12- Shut up. GUMMIE CARE BEARS!!! COME GET THEM! anvil shiftshand sticks out of it  
  
CAG- Hand them over.  
  
Firedragon12- Not until you come out and finish the bios.  
  
CAG- Fine! Mutters about selfish people  
  
gets out and does the other bio  
  
Name: Delia  
  
Piercings: Ears, bellybutton, and places you don't want to think about.  
  
Age: 18  
  
Turn on: Evil guys (who are charming and handsome), tall people  
  
Turns off: Just about everyone who doesn't fit the description above  
  
Her turn on: Knows how to bat her eyelashes, is stunningly beautiful  
  
Her turn off: is evil, and a censored  
  
CAG- NOW GIVE THE GUMMY BEARS OVER!  
  
Firedragon12- mouth full What gummy bears? I don't have any. MWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! swoops off  
  
CAG- ARG! WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK AFTER I KILL HER—I mean, once these commercials are done.


End file.
